The Soul of Discipline

Advance praise for The Soul of Discipline

“The Soul of Discipline offers practical tools for helping parents implement discipline that’s respectful and effective, but the book is so much more. Kim John Payne offers a framework to guide parents in making decisions about why, when, and how to hold tighter reins as we build skills in our children, and why, when, and how to loosen the reins as we scaffold freedom.”—Tina Payne Bryson, Ph.D., co-author of No-Drama Discipline

“This book gets deep inside the challenge of getting along with children and teens and thinks deeply about what they need from us to become strong and self-managing. It elevates discipline to what it should be—a caring process of helping kids orient to the world and live in it happily and well.”—Steve Biddulph, author of The New Manhood

“Kim Payne provides a useful model for choosing our parenting stance—Governor, Gardener, or Guide—depending on the situation. Most powerfully, Payne begins with the radical view that children are not disobedient but rather disoriented. The upshot of this shift in perspective is that discipline is about helping children orient themselves effectively, not about controlling or chastising.”—Lawrence J. Cohen, Ph.D., author of Playful Parenting

“The Soul of Discipline draws on Kim John Payne’s years of gifted school and family counseling to show us with its clear and simple tone how to discipline without becoming our children’s enemy. It is filled with memorable stories, dialogues that will engage your imagination, and great strategies. By the book’s end, a new picture of parenting will live in you, one that will honor the soul of your children as you provide the structure, training, and guidance they need at each stage of their development.”—Dee Joy Coulter, Ed.D., author of Original Mind

A consultant and trainer to 250 U.S. independent and public schools and school districts, Kim John Payne, M.Ed., has been a school and family counselor for more than thirty years. He has also consulted for clinics, training centers, and educational associations in South Africa, Hungary, Israel, Russia, Ireland, Switzerland, Germany, Australia, the United Kingdom, and Canada. He has served as the project director of the Collaborative Counseling Program at Antioch University and the co-director of an extensive research program on a drug-free approach to attention-priority issues. He is the director of the Simplicity Parenting Project and the Center for Social Sustainability and has worked extensively with the American and U.K. Waldorf movements. The author of Games Children Play, Simplicity Parenting, and Beyond Winning, he lives with his wife and two children in Northampton, Massachusetts.

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