Football Jokes

Hundreds of the most hilarious football jokes around. Perfect for football fans to enjoy in-between those all-important World Cup games, Premiere League matches and European Cup finals. When is a footballer like a baby? When it dribbles. Who's in goal when the ghost team plays football? The ghoulie, of course! Why is a football crowd learning to sing like a person opening a tin of sardines? They both have trouble with the key. What goes stomp, stomp, stomp, squelch? An elephant with wet football boots. How does an octopus go on to a football pitch? Well armed! FOOTBALLER: I think I must have hay fever. How can I stop my nose running? DOCTOR: Tackle it. What's the best day for a footballer to eat bacon and eggs for breakfast? Fry-day. Why did the millionaire footballer have no bathroom in his house? He was filthy rich.

Jane Eccles loves drawing and works in a tiny room in her house in Hampshire, where she lives with her husband and son and small grey cat. She has illustrated some very funny books including The Bumper Book of Very Silly Jokes, Football Jokes, and the poetry collection I Love My Mum.

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